He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
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