He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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