it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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