Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
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