oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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