I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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