i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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