so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
