Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.