He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
