what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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