I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
