My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
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my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
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Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
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