We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
as a side note pls kill me
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