So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
