your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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