Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
