i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
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