When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30