absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
