so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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