drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
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