I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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