none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
