SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Randomize
