just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Operation Purity has been aborted
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
