No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
I wanna passion pit in your ass
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
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I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
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