Dual....:-)
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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