Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
