The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
