Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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