You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
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she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
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You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize