You just made me feel so damn special
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
honey bunches of taint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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