this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize