Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
