So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
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