Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Heaven soaked bacon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (818): i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like. (615): Heaven soaked bacon. http://tfl.nu/85uv
  Replies (63) Good night (4234) Bad night (977)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant. http://tfl.nu/28ci
  Replies (2) Good night (740) Bad night (3185)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority http://tfl.nu/980f
  Replies (27) Good night (5215) Bad night (2084)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan. http://tfl.nu/9jkn
  Replies (24) Good night (750) Bad night (5077)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do http://tfl.nu/c5r9
  Replies (14) Good night (5903) Bad night (1484)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa... http://tfl.nu/bbhr
  Replies (18) Good night (5087) Bad night (1148)
• Favorite

  (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+31): I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates. http://tfl.nu/urqj
  Replies (3) Good night (2476) Bad night (677)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (707): Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack. http://tfl.nu/ll0f
  Replies (11) Good night (623) Bad night (1744)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize http://tfl.nu/o5b5
  Replies (4) Good night (1980) Bad night (661)
• Favorite

  (704): View more from North Carolina

  So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (704): So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ... http://tfl.nu/bcgx
  Replies (5) Good night (580) Bad night (1230)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish? http://tfl.nu/4yf1
  Replies (17) Good night (1633) Bad night (728)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.

  (541): View more from Oregon

  I'm dying.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me. (541): I'm dying. http://tfl.nu/wgmh
  Replies (3) Good night (738) Bad night (984)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run. http://tfl.nu/cpd8
  Replies (2) Good night (1595) Bad night (636)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work. http://tfl.nu/wxxj
  Replies (13) Good night (3225) Bad night (753)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know http://tfl.nu/vpyl
  Replies (1) Good night (985) Bad night (374)

Randomize