Texts From Last Night

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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night

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  (541): I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night http://tfl.nu/6f3k
  Replies (6) Good night (1371) Bad night (3567)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  details?

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  alcohol + bed + penis = sex

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  (920): i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir (952): details? (920): alcohol + bed + penis = sex http://tfl.nu/7qj6
  Replies (28) Good night (2924) Bad night (873)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?

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  (516): Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom? http://tfl.nu/hpn8
  Replies (31) Good night (1361) Bad night (6103)
• Favorite

  (915): View more from Texas

  My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!

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  (915): My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!! http://tfl.nu/a7ta
  Replies (22) Good night (6197) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.

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  (307): Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding. http://tfl.nu/82eq
  Replies (10) Good night (4434) Bad night (696)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.

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  (574): he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job. http://tfl.nu/t5km
  Replies (26) Good night (864) Bad night (5344)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.

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  (609): and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience. http://tfl.nu/1o4v
  Replies (34) Good night (904) Bad night (5918)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.

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  (410): Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe. http://tfl.nu/rdse
  Replies (5) Good night (1020) Bad night (2543)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?

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  (918): Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right? http://tfl.nu/jzhy
  Replies (2) Good night (2083) Bad night (734)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.

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  (610): I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal. http://tfl.nu/tm9u
  Replies (14) Good night (1124) Bad night (3406)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.

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  (802): I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms. http://tfl.nu/3zhe
  Replies (9) Good night (533) Bad night (1873)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?

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  (305): Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can? http://tfl.nu/kckv
  Replies (2) Good night (1508) Bad night (654)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.

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  (801): An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts. http://tfl.nu/r3r6
  Replies (5) Good night (544) Bad night (927)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident

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  (610): Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident http://tfl.nu/o3n7
  Replies (8) Good night (560) Bad night (796)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.

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  (859): Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder. http://tfl.nu/f5qx
  Replies (0) Good night (362) Bad night (194)

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