is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.