If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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