D3 body, D1 cock
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
This is my gift to your gina
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
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