If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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