I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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