hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
