I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
