How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
