yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
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