You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
