Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
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