I'm eating all of the evidence.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
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