Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
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The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
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Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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