Texts From Last Night

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  (909): View more from California

  Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.

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  (909): Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome. http://tfl.nu/gu2z
  Replies (29) Good night (5309) Bad night (649)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.

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  (651): i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen. http://tfl.nu/ur6p
  Replies (28) Good night (8707) Bad night (667)
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  (916): View more from California

  let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.

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  (916): let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again. http://tfl.nu/i76s
  Replies (4) Good night (2197) Bad night (599)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.

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  (402): 2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America. http://tfl.nu/5vl1
  Replies (4) Good night (1606) Bad night (616)
• Favorite

  (979): View more from Texas

  He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic

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  (979): He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic http://tfl.nu/8ocy
  Replies (10) Good night (2451) Bad night (985)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.

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  (401): My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar. http://tfl.nu/tapz
  Replies (4) Good night (579) Bad night (2128)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.

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  (410): Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week. http://tfl.nu/e9o5
  Replies (1) Good night (904) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".

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  (540): Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!". http://tfl.nu/uep9
  Replies (7) Good night (823) Bad night (494)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"

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  (727): How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me" http://tfl.nu/2grd
  Replies (3) Good night (718) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.

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  (334): I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system. http://tfl.nu/d0ap
  Replies (1) Good night (585) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (587): View more from Alberta

  Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol

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  (587): Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking. (306): There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol http://tfl.nu/d3jk
  Replies (4) Good night (949) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.

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  (801): If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment. http://tfl.nu/t8v8
  Replies (2) Good night (689) Bad night (305)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...

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  (214): I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter... http://tfl.nu/te1k
  Replies (4) Good night (896) Bad night (237)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.

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  (908): I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen. http://tfl.nu/v4tf
  Replies (4) Good night (806) Bad night (270)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.

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  (905): Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping. http://tfl.nu/2fiu
  Replies (0) Good night (416) Bad night (199)

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