it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize