We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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